.........On our field trip to the City Library, by Me.
Lesson #1 Don't try and be a smarty-pants and say a prayer asking the Good Lord to bless the field trip with Brad Pitt as the Library's Share Reader.
Because what you will get is a very very sweet, soft spoken librarian dressed in a homemade denim cowgirl get-up, with fringe made out of friendship pins, topped off with a red cowgirl hat, whispering to the crowd about how much she loves Cowboys.
Lesson #2 When the very very sweet Cowgirl Librarian, who really loves Cowboys, asks you to "give her 3"...it does NOT mean to give her 3 seconds, 3 minutes, 3 pennies, or even 3 books???
It means to (1) "Turn UP your ears" (2) Turn DOWN your mouths (3) Put your hands to your SIDES! and you best "give her 3" if you don't want to be lassoed!
Lesson #3 What the bottom of the bookdrop looks like.
As time ticked slower than molasses in January, our poor Cowgirl was searching for anything to entertain her restless corral. The bookdrop! She took only 8 at a time, to see "where the books land when you turn them in"! My daughter was not amused when I asked her to take the camera in & snap a picture when it was her "crazy 8" turn to peep down into the bookdrop, so I could add some pictures to my blog when I write about this one! Just as the Cowgirl was not amused when I raised my hand and asked if we could see the microwave in the Library's breakroom next.
Lesson #4 When the Library Card Maker welcomes you to town and asks where you came from........make something up.
Thinking that this is the best time as any to get the family some Library cards, (since my child was the only child in the "library corral" not raising her hand when the Cowgirl asked, "Who has ever done our summer reading program?" Only to be sitting there smiling & quietly adoring the red straw cowgirl hat on the Cowgirl's head.)
I decide...maybe it is time to introduce my girls to the Library this summer! SO...to the desk I gallop. After filling out the necessary paperwork, the Library Card Maker says, "
Oh honey! Welcome, you must be new in town, where'd you move from?" I,
ever so quickly to catch on, reply, "
Oh NO! I've lived here all my li...........fe!" ohhhhh! uh-oh!
After watching the 2 Library Card Maker ladies glance disapprovingly at each other, and then back my way..........as to be saying, "
Lived here your whole life and JUST NOW getting a Library Card?! hmmmmmm? Mom of The Year....We think NOT!"
I responded ever so slyly with, "
Oh! I'm sorry did I say new cards, I meant replacement cards....we just need updated pictures!"Smile honey!